The skyrocketing price of animated features in a waning market scares the hell out of Disney. So recently, the Mouse has taken steps to ensure their popularity in the years to come. Embark with Akadot on its journey to explore ...

10: Chip and Dale, the cute little chipmunks, will change their names to Chipotolihtl and Dalerscryphanx, the dark lords of Niahwatsa.

9: Sudden drafts will expose Minnie's adorable underwear, and Disney animators will add panties to Daisy Duck so that audiences can glimpse hers as well.

8: Devil Hunter Mickey.

7: Penguins, lots of them, everywhere.

6: Imagineers will develop a fifty-foot, mechanical robot to do battle with Warner Brothers' Iron Giant.

5: Eisner plans to purchase Japan for $6.2 Trillion.

4: In a re-write of "The Little Mermaid," just as Prince Eric steers the point of his ship into Ursula's gut, an intense bright light emanates from her eviscerated belly unlocking the prison that kept caged Goofy, the demon warrior who spreads destruction on land and sea.

3: "Mulan" sans Eddie Murphy.

2: "Final Fantasia 2001: The Legend of the Wind"

1: Get on The Cartoon Network. And if that fails, buy out Time Warner.